Dating Sucks. I think I've seen this movie before...

All I want is to be with someone who's company I enjoy, who has interests/hobbies, and who shares the same values. Oh and obviously attraction is important.

WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO FIND?

The more first dates I go on, the more I am favoring the idea of becoming a perpetual wanderer. I've been on a couple dates since my split with Mr. Awesome. The first guy was nice and cute but when I asked him what he liked to do in his spare time. He replied "I dunno... I work and I hang out." When it comes to men, I don't care WHAT thier hobbies are, they just need to have them. He didn't really say a whole lot, maybe he wasn't interested in me. In anycase, I made an excuse to leave about 30 minutes in, because I knew it wasn't going anywhere.

The second guy was an arrogant ass. He wouldn't shut-up about himself and how he was better than everyone else. He also was rude to waitress when we got the bill. That is an instant "SEE YA" We get the bill and I go to bid my farwell, forever and he tries to kiss me. I think that's the best thing about being short... you always see it coming in time to get out the way. He's called me twice since... Like I'm answering those calls.

NEXT!

I'm supposed to go on a date with some cop which I'm a little excited about because I'm sure he'll have more to talk about then "that time he was so drunk..." or his last hunting trip. I've heard that he's seen pictures of me and is looking forward to our date. However he has somehow gotten into his head that it would more comfortable to double date. I don't agree because the double would include my brother and his girlfriend. Soooooo, I've instructed my so-called friends to just give the guy my number. To my knowledge, that hasn't been done and this date may never happen.

To be continued... (unfortunately) HA!

My winter wonderland... as in: I wonder if I can really keep this up all winter?

So I've decided it feels good to be busy! Here is the schedule I've created for myself...

Mondays:
5:30a: Wake-up
6a-7a: Workout
5p-7p: Ride Horse
9:30p: Sleep

Tuesdays:
5:30a: Wake-up
7a-8a: Figure Skate
5p-7p: Ride Horse
7:30p-8:30p: Workout
9:30p: Sleep

Wednesdays:
5:30a: Wake-up
6a-7a: Workout
7p-9p: Curl
10:30p: Sleep

Thursdays:
6:30a: Wake-up
7a-8a: Figure Skate
5p-7p: Ride Horse
7:30p-8:30p: Workout
9:30p: Sleep

Fridays:
5:30a: Wake-up
5p-7p: Ride Horse
9:30p: Sleep

Satudays:
10a-11a: Workout

I imagine the first month or so is going to be difficult as I get used to all the activity. I'm going to give it an entire month to see if I can indeed adjust to this schedule. I'm pretty confident that I will.

Then once I'm used to that schedule I should be able to find room to learn to snowboard on weekends... or maybe I'll just be a couch potato.

Final words for Mr. Awesome(ly Stupid)

I wrote Mr. Awesome a letter. To tell him that I wasn't ready to give up on us. I needed to tell him how I felt. I knew getting back together was unlikely, but on the off chance he was having regrets, I had to let him know. I dropped the letter off last friday and I've had no response. Which in itself is a response.

So, I've accepted the fact that it's over. He dumped me. I didn't see it coming. It was painful and embarassing

I made a promise to myself a long time ago, that I would never let pride be a barrier for me in relationships. I'd never wonder, what could have been if I'd only said this or done that. In writing the letter, I've put myself out there, and his lack of reaction allows me move on without question or regret.

More than anything I want to be with someone who is excited and proud to be with me. Someone who wonders how they got so lucky to have me in their life. If he can't be that, then everything else is irrelevant, no matter how good it was.

It was pretty damn good... he opened me up to some new experiences, helped me get over some fears and was a friend through it all. I can't feel bad about that.

In the end the guy's an idiot. Letting me go is probably the stupidest thing he's ever done and stupidity is just not an attractive quality. Not at all.

Because sometimes you need help to feel

What I've learned over the past week: Nothing beats a good cry.

Underwear is funny, eggs are not. And a few things that happened "the other night"

Last weekend, Mr. Awesome (yes the guy who dumped me not a week before) invited me to go away with him. I went. I wasn't sure it was a good idea at first and at first it was pretty awkward. Then we were laughing, having a good time, enjoying each other's company. We had a great weekend. He dropped me off on Sunday night and I haven't heard from him since.

That's egg on my face.

The whole break-up is one for the record books to be filed under WEIRDEST. EVER.

In other personal news, I have the opportunity to go on a date with another guy. I'm not sure how I feel about that... but as a good friend of mine would say: "the quickest way to get over a man is with another man."

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So I'm lying in bed the other night and I hear this knock on my door. I open the door, sleep in my eyes and my hair a mess, to a firefighter in uniform. He wants to check out my balcony... I'm never going to bed without looking my best EVER AGAIN

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It was dark and cold and I saw some dude walking down the street the other night in his bare feet. Now that's what I call being in a rush.

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And how odd is this... Every morning this week I have come across a piece of stray underwear in my apartment hallway. Bras, panties, boxers... Uhmmm, where was my invite to that party?

What? ...girls who cry themselves to sleep at night aren't fun people to have at parties?

Says who?

HI-YA, right to the stomach

I was dumped last night. What I thought was a small issue that needed some talking out, turned into me being let go. It came out of nowhere like a karate chop to the stomach. I thought things were pretty great. I thought wrong.

I'm not going to lie, it hurts.

This almost happened

Ever had a bat hiss at you before dive bombing your head and scratching your eyes out with it's fangs? Me neither but I came real close this weekend. I was minding my own business opening up the shed door when I hear this hissing sound. I look around and not 10 feet away is this black creature with giant fangs. IT WAS A BAT. He hisses again and I run screaming from the building. Good thing I ran. I mean, I still have my eyes.